March 24, 2021
ex post facto – phrase (latin) : done, made, or formulated after the fact (literally: “from a thing done afterward”)
It’s pure serendipity that my column looking back at my journey to rediscover the joy of Magic is post #50. When I wrote about my Innistrad packs and planned my three-part look at anxiety’s affect on how I engage with Magic, I hadn’t looked at the column numbering. My plan was to write the three anxiety columns and then draft my retrospective. It’s a happy accident that the anxiety columns concluded with post #49.
Truthfully, I’d hoped to write this early in January, to celebrate a year of blogging. Life predictably intervened. Such are the breaks.
Fourteen months after I officially began this quest, where do things stand? What is my “Magic mentality”, so to speak? Did I find joy? Did I open packs, build decks, try something new? Did I learn to unclench my rage-locked fists at yet another Arena match-up with a Yorion pile?
Answers will be forthcoming, but first I thought I’d look at some highlights – and lowlights – of the past year(ish). I’ll conclude with a more verbose commentary on the journey so far.
Best pack
My anxiety notwithstanding, I did manage to open some packs. Prerelease kits, my makeshift advent calendar, a box of Commander Legends collector boosters…all were sacrificed in the name of fun. I didn’t track every pack I opened, but I tracked a lot, and there was one very clear winner: Commander Legends collector booster #10. Check out these pulls:
There were other decent cards in the pack, like a foil extended art Commander’s Sphere and an extended art Path of Ancestry. The value of the pack at the time I opened it was over $100. Obviously the Mana Drain was the bulk of that, and is the single most valuable card I’ve ever opened in a pack at the time I opened it. But it took the other pulls to push the pack over that $100 mark – a pretty monumental total for a single pack.
Worst pack
While it would be simple to point to any number of standard packs that contained a bobo rare, that’s not terribly interesting (or funny.) I’ll instead go with a Zendikar Rising collector booster with these stellar “hits”:
The siren call of ZNR collector boosters is undoubtedly the chance to get expedition lands, and I did get a few in my box, along with fantastic box toppers. While ZNR itself isn’t brimming with value, I got my money’s worth via the expeditions and some foil and/or alternate art pathways. This particular pack, however, totaled a horrific $3.78 in value at the time of opening (surely less now.) Considering $15 is typically the cheapest you’ll find a collector booster, this particular pack was an embarrassment of awfulness.
Favorite deck
My original, pre-rotation Mardoom has no competition. I’ve currently got a rotation of about 6 decks I’m playing on Arena, and all are enjoyable, but none come close to the ecstasy Mardoom gave me. I’ve tried to build various post-rotation Doom Foretold decks, with mixed results. Tergrid, God of Fright is a perfect complement to that card, but I’ve yet to get her to work more than a handful of times. My opponents, almost universally, have the kill spell in hand the instant Tergrid trots onto the battlefield.
Dumbest mistake I kept making on Arena
The ease with which you can find a match on Arena is a double-edged sword. That I can suffer a humiliating loss and then immediately jump into a new match to chase redemption is a godsend. But it leads to sloppy habits. I’ve had a blue/red giant tribal deck that I’ve been playing with for a few weeks, and its mana base is a mess. Despite having 26 lands, I swear my opening hand is perpetually a 2-lander, and I always (as in ALWAYS) draw a land that comes into play tapped when I desperately need an untapped land to keep myself afloat. I wager I’ve played at least 50 matches with the deck where I tell myself that the moment the game is over, I’m editing the deck and rejiggering the mana. And then when I frequently lose due to some mana issue, I express my frustration by immediately smashing the “Play” button to get into a new match that I’m sure will go better.
And due to typing out the above, I’ve finally edited the damn deck and tweaked the mana. That this is what it took for me to fix something I was so frustrated with is absurd.
Deck I most hated facing
How to choose? There have been so very many decks that irritate me to the point of exasperation, choosing one is difficult. Yorion decks are certainly in contention. Despite not being a top competitive option in Standard, I sure see a lot of them, and they always thrash me thoroughly.
Other match-ups like Rogues I just auto-concede to, even with decks that stand a chance against them. And I’m so very, very tired of the likes of mono-red aggro and Shark Typhoon control.
But I’ll give the nod to Gate decks pre-rotation. They were never serious contenders in Standard, but I couldn’t beat them. EVER. Not with Gruul aggro, not with Azorious flyers, not with Mardoom or Setessan Champion enchantments or Izzet spellslinging. The deck always had Gates Ablaze in hand, it always landed Archway Angel for 12-16 life when I was one combat away from pulling off a win, and it always drew at least 5 cards off of Guild Summit. I was always sure I could beat that stupid deck, because it wasn’t THAT good. But against me…it was unbeatable. Truly my nemesis for months.
Best set released since Jan. of 2020
Despite the financial and play value oozing from Commander Legends, I have to pick a Standard set available on Arena, as those are nearly the only cards I’ve gotten to use (Jump Start and Modern Horizons did get brief cameos last fall during the family outing to the mountains, but I didn’t play those cards enough to get a good idea of what the sets are like.)
I do seriously dig the mutate mechanic from Ikoria. But when I play a mutate-based deck I get blown out. When I play against a mutate-based deck, I get blown out. Zendikar Rising’s landfall mechanic and associated shenanigans are just fair to middlin’ in my eyes. Kaldheim has been oodles of fun so far, but I’m missing a lot of key rares from the set to make some of the decks I’d like to tinker with, so I’d have to grade it “incomplete” so far. That’s on me, though, not the set.
Core Set 2021 is disqualified for Ugin alone. That’s a mistake that drags the entire set down, in my eyes.
That leaves Theros: Beyond Death, whose cards are likely more represented in my Arena decks than any other set. I love enchantments or cards that key off them, and Archon of Sun’s Grace is the runaway coolest pegasus over printed. Except I just looked up the card, and it’s an Archon instead of a pegasus?! What the hell? Lame.
No matter. THB gets my vote as most enjoyable set from the past year or so, but not by any sort of landslide. I’ll miss it dearly when it rotates, but rotation will remove so much obnoxiousness in standard, I’ll deal.
Worst foil I opened
Take a look at the art of Szat’s Will. It’s not a particularly good piece of art to begin with. From a cursory glance it looks like nothing more than a torso, and a deeper study of the art doesn’t reveal much more. That the only parts of the art that shine in the foil version are the grey lines in the tentacles (and even then just barely) makes it a bad card with bad art that’s also an aggressively dull foil. That mine (like everyone else’s, no doubt) is also remarkably curled is just the whipped topping insult to the initial injury of opening the card in a pack.
Coolest planeswalker sidekick
Lukka’s winged tiger that he bonds with is certainly cool and intimidating, but Lukka never names her and she gets killed rather unceremoniously. What else we got?
Vivien Reid can summon a whole host of ghostly green sidekick critters, and she has cards for a crocodile, grizzly, and jaguar. All relatively cool, but a bit nondescript. She appears to bond with a variety of creatures on Ikoria, but the one she’s pictured with on several cards doesn’t seem to be identified in any way. Any other options?
Going back a bit further, there’s Huatli’s Raptor, and a dinosaur sidekick is pretty badass. I don’t know if it has a name, but it has its own card. We may have a winner. But we’ll keep looking…
Mowu! How could I forget Mowu! Jiang Yanggu’s fluffy flunky is cute when he’s small and has three poofy tails when he’s big. He’s also got a charm on his collar that resembles a Christmas stocking or a chili pepper, but that’s nitpicking. Not only does Mowu have his own card and several tokens, but he’s been depicted in the art of several other cards. I think a magic puppy that might be made out of rock and can grow in size and number of tails is insanely awesome. I don’t see what could possibly best Mowu as coolest sidekick.
No. Wait. I’ve got it! The third planeswalker that appeared on Ikoria has, by far, the coolest sidekick:
Cutest Art
I’m going to cheat a little here. It hasn’t been released yet, but no card, past or present, will compete with bear wizard with monocle and adorable bug friends (the blue one on his left paw is even waving!) I just hope it’s not a draft chaff common, because I will want to play this in every deck of its color(s).
Spiffiest Arena mythic animation
Goldspan Dragon. Just look at how epic this dude is:
Worst use of good art
Seb McKinnon’s art is so unique and instantly recognizable. If you don’t know his name or his art, but you play Magic, you are seriously daft. Check out this beauty:
This art is a sinister treasure; the rare Wizards wasted it on, Allure of the Unknown, is a dreadful bobo. It’s the second cheapest rare in THB, one cent ahead of Nessian Boar and one cent behind several other trash rares. I think I saw someone cast this card on Arena once. Sorry, Seb, your efforts deserved so much better.
New Legend that may get me to build a Commander deck
Ghen, Arcanum Weaver was designed for me. Not “players like me”. Just me. Other people can play the card. I’ll share him with the rest of you. But Ghen was personally created to bring me into Commander. He’s my favorite color combination – Mardu – AND focuses on my favorite card type – enchantments. I have no idea how to build around Ghen, or even how to assemble a decent Commander deck, but I can’t imagine a more perfect legend to entice me to learn.
Biggest blunder – financial
Selling one of my two Gaea’s Cradles to a friend for $300 mere days before its price doubled (it’s now worth over $1150.) Stroke of luck for friend, maddening regret for me.
Biggest blunder – play
Using my only 4 open mana to mistakenly untap an already untapped Tergrid’s Lantern. That meant I couldn’t use the ability twice, which would have secured me a win in one of the most epic Arena battles I’d ever fought. Instead I used the Lantern just once, my opponent untapped and draw Rankle (stupid Haste), and hit me for the victory.
Few things are as frustrating as losing an Arena match by doing something moronic that you’d never have done if playing with paper cards. And considering how many times I’ve botched plays on Arena by selecting the wrong option for a modal card or a permanent with multiple abilities, you’d think I’d have learned to wait the extra half second to ensure I click the right thing. I’d tapped and untapped that blasted Lantern at least 10 times in the match already, without screwing up. And then I collapsed under pressure. Beyond dumb.
Yes, I’m still salty.
Coolest bobo rare opened
Esika’s Chariot is not a good card. The standard version has cute cats in the art, but that’s about the only positive that can be said about it. The first Kaldheim collector booster I opened had a foil showcase version of the card in the penultimate (i.e. money) slot. You can get a foil showcase for $1.
Not a great pull by any measure, but damn is it a nifty looking piece of cardboard:
The “Boy, did I have that wrong” award
I thought Elder Gargaroth’s art showed the creature looking right, with giant horns coming out the back of its head. It is, in fact, looking left, with tusks coming out of its mouth.
The “Say something nice about M21” category
The showcase cards are mostly bland and bad, the enemy color Temple reprints were unnecessary and a waste of multiple rare slots, Ugin is a horrific mistake to print back into Standard, the legends were largely underwhelming, and every single time my opponent plays Seasoned Hallowblade, they wreck me with it. Oh, and my kid’s prerelease promo was Pursued Whale. That’s crap, and entirely the set’s fault.
Wait, I was supposed to say something nice about the set? Oof. Alright, if I must: the bundle promo is a rather cool alternate art Pack Leader.
Oh, and here’s a bonus “nice thing”: Rin and Seri was a fun (and adorable) buy-a-box promo. I didn’t buy a box, so I had to get it as a single, but that duo will likely helm the second Commander deck I build.
That’s it. That’s all I got.
Replacing the Core set this year with the Dungeons and Dragons set is a stroke of genius, even if they botch the execution of it.
Neutral.
The word itself is just so…neutral: both wonky (“eu”?) and bland (“al”). It could be all cool like “new troll!” or “newt roll!”, but instead is another word for unexceptional.
That’s how I’d describe my Magical journey since 1/1/2020. My grand plans to try Commander at my LGS were rightfully scuttled, and I spent the year largely immersed in Arena, with occasional kitchen table diversions with a reluctant kid who was far more interested in opening packs than doing anything with the cards they contained.
My Arena winrate, if you discount the decks I auto-conceded to, was almost assuredly an uninspiring 50%. There were stretches where I played for the pure joy of the game, and periods of slogging drudgery that amounted to little more than joylessly earning daily or weekly rewards.
My goal of using this blog to encourage the opening of packs seems laughable now. It wasn’t until December that I cracked some packs “just for the fun of it”, and I was rewarded with a pretty substantial cache of great cards (plus a sizeable dollop of regret over my decision to crack those packs.)
If I’d written this post a few weeks ago, I’d have said I was in a similar headspace as I was 14 months ago. I might’ve even been (mildly) pessimistic about the next chapter I was starting.
And then I did something I hate doing: I pushed the kid to spend time on a task I knew he didn’t want to do. If my kid ever describes me as controlling, or overbearing, or meddlesome, he’s a filthy little liar. He spends the vast majority of his free time doing his own thing – mostly playing Xbox, with the occasional respite reading fantasy books. COVID suspended his weekly tae kwon do and piano classes, leaving him with school and…screens. Lots of screens. Magic barely registered on his radar, though he’d have insisted otherwise if questioned.
It was the Kaldheim collector boosters that did it. I wanted to open some, and I wanted to have a REASON to open some. And so I created a reason: prize packs. The kid was tasked with making two decks to battle with. He didn’t do it. I reminded him of the task. He still didn’t do it. I badgered him even more.
No decks.
Tearing the plastic wrap off the box of Kaldheim collector boosters took more willpower than I thought I possessed, but once it was off, I was committed. Two packs were removed and put on the kitchen table next to his seat. A hard deadline for deck building was imposed – and met! Decks were shuffled, games were played, prize packs were opened. Awesome cards were revealed and added to our respective collections. Shockingly, decks were even updated afterwards.
And for perhaps the first time in 14 months, games were played again a week later. “Monday Magic” (or least weekly games) was instituted. More packs were opened, more cool cards divvied up, and more decks built. Magic was even played twice in the same week!
Cynicism lives in a very special chateau nestled deep within my heart, but somehow I’ve boarded the place up and turned off the lights. At least where Magic is concerned, I’m optimistic. Maybe it’s because other facets of my life are looking stormy and bleak, but I am embracing this positivity. The kid and I will play Magic and have fun. Until we don’t. Except that’s not going to happen. This time is different. It must be.
Could I be lamenting this rosy outlook a week from now? No. Not happening. There will be “Magic Mondays”, or the equivalent, until Strixhaven releases. And we’ll buy prerelease kits, open prize packs, make new decks. Who knows, we might even venture to the LGS this fall and try Commander together, pandemic permitting.
It may not be the start of a new decade, or even a new year, but it’s a new era.
And it will be Magical.
Casual Magicking 
